Dear Michael
December 22 2012 Dear Michael, Hey babe, I haven't heard from you in a while. I just wanted to check in. I've missed you so much since summer. I just wanted to write to you about how much I'm looking forward to seeing you again on Christmas. My mother and I are making those cookies that you loved last time. It sucks that we live so far away from each other now- but I still love you. So get over here on Christmas and let me show it. Love, Maria December 26 2012 Dear Michael, Now, first and foremost, I wanted to say I am not angry with you at all. I know that you have a very busy life now that you've gone away for school. I still love you, and I hope you had an amazing Christmas. I was sure you would come, but I remember my mother saying something about something happening to you so you couldn't come. It's alright, I'm sure it was more important than driving all the way here just for a dinner. I really hope to see you sometime soon during your holiday, babe. Love, Maria January 1 2013 Dear Michael, Hey babe, I just wanted to check in on you again. I was shopping and I saw a bunch of those hats you love to wear on sale. They reminded me of you, so I picked one up for you. I really look forward to giving it to you once you come visit. Can't wait! Love, Maria January 7 2013 Dear Michael, Do you remember that time we took your father's boat out to the bay? You took me in your arms and told me that one day we'd have a family together. We'd live in a riverside house together. We'd have two dogs, and two sweet little girls that we would care for with each other. You said one day, when you're done with college, you'll take me to see the world, and you'll buy us our own boat so we can go out into the cove with our children and enjoy life. I don't know why, but I'm really missing you right now. Again, I know you're busy, but please try to visit soon! I know you're trying your best. I'll see you soon! I can't stop thinking about you. No one understands it. It's their loss. They're just jealous I should make them go away. There's no one here. I miss you. Love, Maria January 13 2013 Dear Michael, I had a friend over in my room, so I told her about the letters I've been sending you. I also told her about how long I've been waiting for you to come visit. She said that you would never come! I don't know why she was so mean like that. I thought it was really rude. I got mad at her, and then I yelled at her to leave. I didn't want people to talk about you like that. Why would anyone say that you were not coming? I know you are. I know you'll be here any minute. And I'll be standing in my door, waiting for you. Maybe you've already come and I've been busy or asleep or something. I'm so stupid then. My mom isn't any help. She doesn't like you, especially now. You'll prove everyone wrong when you get here then they'll go away. Love you, babe. Love, Maria January 17 2013 Dear Michael, I miss you so much. I kind of expected you to have come by now, and I wanted to introduce you to my friends. But since you're so busy and I get that, I invited them all over and we talked about you. Well, to be honest, only one friend actually showed up. The others went away. We spent Friday night talking about you. I just went on and on. I talked about how you had an amazing smile- and how you made all my problems go away when you held me in your arms. I don't know why, but after a while the friend I had invited ran out of the room. She had tears in her eyes and was holding her hands to her eyes. She left right afterwards and didn't even say good bye. I guess she was so excited and happy for me that you were coming to visit. Or, maybe she was jealous of how perfect of a boyfriend you are. I am getting that vibe from a lot of people for some reason- I don't know why. When you get here, we need to go away together. Just the two of us. I'm tired of people. They're not you so they're nobody. Can't wait to see you. Love, Maria January 20th 2013 Dear Michael, I miss you so much. Yesterday, I locked myself in my room one morning and daydreamed about you. My mother barged in and yelled at me for not going to school though. She says I can't write any letters to you anymore! She said that you were never coming! Even WORSE, after school, a couple of my close friends came over. They all talked to me like I was stupid, for some reason. They all said I couldn't write any letters to you anymore. They all said you were never coming! How are they ALL JEALOUS OF ME!? YOU'LL SHOW THEM. I thought they were my friends too. You're my only real friend. Don't worry about the others. I can make them go away. It's fun. I've done it with a lot of people already. It's so easy. You'll show them. I can't wait for you to come. I know you'll come and you'll hold me and all my problems will go away. Please come. I miss you. Please come. Love, Maria January 22 2013 Dear Michael, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I've been expecting so much of you. I know you're really busy. I know you're trying your best to come to me. I am only making you feel guilt by pinning all my problems on you. I'm only giving you more to worry about. How selfish of me. I'll come to you, Michael. Then, we can have our boat together. We can raise children together. We can be together. I can't believe I was being so stupid. I'm so stupid. Sorry. I just can't think right now. You always make it better. I'll be right there. God I'm stupid and I've been this entire time so I'm sorry. I must sound like such a horrible person. You are busy and you are smart and you are helping people and I'm just being dumb. What kind of a person am I? I'm so sorry I've been so horrible to you. I'll be right there. Love you forever, Maria A Maria Kuelling was found in her bedroom late at night on January 22th, 2013. She had hung herself. There were two things found on the bed. One was a packet comprising of the above letters. The second was a newspaper clipping. The article on the newspaper clipping was entitled College Student Killed in Fatal Highway Accident. The article on the newspaper was dated December 25th, 2012. It was said that her eyes gave a look as if it was worth it. Category:Diary/Journal